The Biblical story of Sodom and Gommorah is one of those passages that gets used and abused and thrown around as a story of “see how those gays are trying to take over the world?!” See how their depraved and violent they are? There’s also a sense of “see what happens in the big city?!” about it. A less spoken of is the idea that violence, out-of-proportion lust, and rape have been around since nearly the beginning of time.
Yesterday, in New York City, apparently, some members of the Latin Kings Goonies discovered a member of their gang was gay and brutally raped him, then went wilding and raped another man, then dragged an older man out of his house, tortured and raped him.
Wild packs of men dragging people out of their house so that they can rape them was just too much of a parallel to pass up. Certainly, if you asked the members of the gang if they were “straight”, they would say “yes” and that they would say they “proved” it by torturing and raping these people. No doubt the people around them wouldn’t dare question their sexuality. So where does that leave us? It leaves us with acknowledgement that hetero people also rape people of the same sex. Of course, we already knew that heterosexual men rape people of the opposite sex. We see that all over the TV and newspapers. In prison, or in gangs, the lesser known truth is that supposedly heterosexual women use objects to rape other women or girls and so on. And in the “regular world” women molest boys all the time.
The point is this — rape happens and violence happens and mob rule exists — and it is not just about homosexuals. It happens by heterosexuals as well, and it’s wrong. Right about now, my nice, decent, straight friends are screaming, “But only a few straight men do this!” and they are right. Their voices continue in my head, “Rape is about violence, not sex or love!” And again, they are correct.
OK, now turn it around and you can hear what gay folks have been saying for years — “But only a few gay men do this!” and they are right. They continue on “Rape is about violence, not sex or love!” and they are right.
Forced sex is violence. Violent people, twisted people, hurting people of all persuasions, act out sexually as a way of dominating others. Torture is violence. Violent, twisted, hurting people of all colors, creeds, religions, philosophies, etc. engage in torture. One of the ironies of our lives is that people take the beautiful thing that love(making) is and they confuse, abuse it, misuse it with violence — and we have for centuries.
The idea that people show that one form of sexuality is bad by engaging in it is ludicrous. For people to prove they are heterosexual by engaging in homosexual acts (not gay acts, mind you, but homo-sexual [literally “same-sex”] acts ) is just bizarre — and ridiculous.
Sexuality, gender identity, love, lust, are all a lot more complex than we know, even if they are fairly simple in most of us. But in any case, violence is violence, no matter who commits it. Torture is torture, no matter who commits it. Wrong is wrong no matter who commits it.
Love is love. Lovemaking is lovemaking, provided that all parties agree to it in the first place. Good is good no matter who commits it. Let’s not confuse violence and love. And lets not say that gay folks are the ones who do.