I can’t say this in class, because my psychology class is not about my religion, but I sooo want to say it out loud. I have an anorexic in class and I feel so bad for her. I know she’s an anorexic because she wrote that she was in a reflection paper. I couldn’t explain why I was so confused by anorexia. I couldn’t explain to the class why I am confused by high heels or earrings or fashion-fights or any of a number of things that women do to please men.
This sentiment doesn’t come from feminism per se, but from something totally different. When I was a kid, Vietnam vets were coming home and saying things like “I fought for you!”. Hippies would respond, “Don’t blame it on me. I didn’t ask you to”. I still don’t think our troops are fighting for me. They’re fighting because of the idiot that sent them there. Maybe they’re fighting because they believe they’re fighting for my freedom. I respect that, but for me? Fighting in Iraq? You can come home now, if you think I sent you. I have no interest in power over your life-and-death.
Which leads me back to women. Don’t hurt yourself on account of me. As a man, as a person, as myself, as a Christian, just don’t do it. I’m not who you should be trying to impress. I think you should be trying to impress God. And I think you and God together are wise enough to figure out what that means.
I know that traditional Christianity has said that the hierarchy is this: God, men, women, children, animals, insects, etc. I know that the Bible says (in one part) that women were an afterthought to help men. I know that Paul says “women should keep silent in church”. I know that Jesus was a guy, and that God is believed to be a guy by many. But there are other Biblical spots which say that men and women were both created by God — at the same time. I know that Paul also acknowledges women who were priests in the early Christian community. Further, while Jesus was a guy, God is too big to be trapped in one body or another generally. I think of God as Spirit — wicked big, unfathomable Spirit. Further, I think of God as Creator. So here’s how I see it: God created both men and women. Those who are created by God are worthy of my time and effort because God says they are. What God creates is good. Some flaws here and there, but generally OK. That means me and you — and nature, but I have trouble with mosquitoes and other natural things I don’t get.
We — you and me and nature are secondary to God. God is the person that we all need to be focused on as far as what’s right and what’s wrong.
No man is God. Well, OK one was once, but today, no guy is God. If a man or a woman tells you that I’m more important than you, I tell you I’m not. If someone tells you that I get a say in what you look like, I tell you I don’t. If someone says you can’t preach because you’re not a guy, I say they’re wrong. If someone says I’m worth more money than you are, I say they’re wrong. If someone says my opinion counts more than yours, I say “wrong again, moose-breath!”. If someone tells you I should have control over your body in any way, I say “I don’t want it, unless you want to give it to me. And then, I still don’t want it unless you’re my wife”, which most of you aren’t. Well, OK, I might want your body, (I’m not dead yet), but I don’t get it. I want lots of things, but I don’t get them either.
You’re you. I’m me. Other people are them. You’re as valuable as I am. Don’t hurt yourself for me or any man. Don’t give up your dreams for me or any man. Don’t feel powerless because of me or any man. We’re not what you should be focused on. You’ve got a life all your own.